Shattered Smile: Chapter 1

[lilly0]

Title: Shattered Smile Chapter 1
Pairing: Sakumoto
Rating: PG-13 (for now?)
Genre: romance, hurt&comfort
Plot: Young and ambitious medicine student Sho gets hired by wealthy Matsumoto-san to tutor his 19-year old son Jun. Jun spent months in hospital, they say, but now wants to get into a college. Soon Sho realizes that tutoring Jun is not all he needs to do. Jun seems to be broken, hiding from the world and not even opening up to his family anymore. I want to see him smile again, his father said, but no one tells Sho anything about what happened to Jun...  It's incredible hard to put the broken pieces together again but Sho wants to try.
Note: This is my belated birthday story for cielmelodies . I'm sorry it's soooo late!! I hope you will like it! Jun is like a lost puppy that needs to be cuddled.

 

It’s a good opportunity, it really is. After all most of the money he has goes into his tuition fee and rent, so to buy a few books and personal things he needs to have some extra money. He knows his parents provide him with everything, but he wants to stand on his own two legs too and not just depend on them. Living off his wealthy parents for even the tiniest thing is just… no. When it’s about something more luxurious, things he wants for his pleasure, he wants to earn his own money.

 

“I’ve heard you are studying medicine, Sho-kun, is that true?”

 

“Yes.” Sho nods his head. “It was always my dream to become a doctor.”

 

“And your parents supported you?”

 

Sho chuckles. “It’s funny that you ask,” he says with a smile. “Because I was scared first to tell my father, I thought he wanted me to become his successor.”

 

The man in front of him smiles. He has a stoic face but his eyes are soft and sometimes his lips tug in amusement. “But you told him the truth eventually?”

 

“Of course, after all there was no other option for me than to become a doctor,” Sho says with emphasis. “And he accepted it. He even said he is happy for the career path I chose.”

 

The man laughs. “Typical for my old friend Sakurai.” He pulls on his cigarette, eyeing Sho curiously. “And why did you choose to become a doctor, if I may ask?”

 

Sho’s eyes gleam. “I’ve always wanted to become a doctor! Since as long as I can remember. When I was a teenager I volunteered in hospital every summer, and it was such a fulfilling work. Many people say it’s sad, and that’s true, but I want to help. If I’m able to save even one person with my research, I’ve already won!” he exclaims, blushing slightly when he realizes he probably got carried away. “I’m sorry,” he stutters. “You might think I’m a dreamer, Matsumoto-san, talking like a child.”

 

Matsumoto chuckles. “Not at all.” He tilts his head. “I’ve heard you study a lot, Sho-kun, how do you manage to still have a social life?”

 

To be honest, Sho does not have a social life at all, but he does not mind. His studies come first for now, although he feels lonely sometimes. He tells himself though that once he is finished with his studies, he will finally be ready to live properly.

 

Sho sighs slightly, trying to shift the topic. “About the tutor job you wanted to talk to me about…”

 

“Young people are always so impatient,” Matsumoto jokes, but soon his eyes grow more serious. “Sho-kun, my son was sick most of the last year. It’s a miracle he was able to finish High School, and it was just thanks to them being so understanding that he could do some work from home or hospital. He couldn’t take any entrance exams for the universities though because of his health, but now that he feels better, he wants to study again and give it a try.”

 

Sho nods, listening closely. “It means he has a little less than one year to catch up with everything and prepare for the upcoming entrance exams?” He asks, taking notes eagerly. That’s a lot.

 

The man smiles. “Yes, I know it’s not an easy job. I don’t want him to go to cram school or anything alike. I want him to study in a casual, relaxing atmosphere. He finally started to feel better again and we don’t want his health do falter again. I was searching for a good private tutor, when I met your father for our monthly Mahjongg game. He told me a lot about you.”

 

Sho blushes. Got the job over his parents again? “I hope I can meet your expectations, Matsumoto-san.”

 

“I’m sure you can,” the man smiles. “I took the liberty to research your name and it seems you are good in all subjects, and always have the highest marks. Also I have heard you successfully tutored others too. Besides… you are passionate about your job choice. I like that”

 

Sho’s eyes widen, his heart jumping in joy. So, his father just introduced them to each other, but in the end, this man wants to hire him because he thinks he is good. Matsumoto Junichi senior is the head of a law company, his name weighs a lot. He is friends with Sho’s father since many years, apparently they went to college together. Also their wives were friends for a long time, until Matsumoto’s wife passed away. He knows he can’t disappoint this man, he can’t fail. “I know your son already graduated but do you think it’s possible to see his school work from his last year? Tests, homework and alike? It would help me a lot to see where I have to start.” He checks his notes. “Also it would help to know which universities he wants to apply for and the subjects he is interested in, so that I can research exactly what they require.”

 

A chuckle. “That’s the dedication I wanted to see, Sho-kun. Of course, I’ll talk to the school. You can go there anytime.” He pauses. “Listen, Sho-kun, my son is not in the best place emotionally, which is why we start so early with his tutor lessons. I want him to start slowly, and regain some joy in life again.”

 

Sho blinks in surprise. “Excuse me, sir, but what do you mean?”

 

“I haven’t seen him smiling for a year. I would like to see his happy face again. The incidents which made him sick came and took a lot more than just his physical health. It feels like he can’t be happy anymore. You asked me which universities he is interested in. Well, that’s already the problem, Jun hasn’t shown any interest in anything since months.” Matsumoto slips closer. “Sho-kun, you have all the liberties you want and need. If you feel the need to take my son on a vacation to help him study, if you want to make a field trip, if you need to visit a factory abroad, whatever, money is not an issue. You can do whatever you want, as long as my son will in some way benefit from it. If by the end of the year, the light is back in his eyes and he makes it to only one college, I’m already content.”

 

Sho stares at the  man in surprise, slowly beginning to understand that this work is probably going to be pretty difficult. “May I ask something personal?” Sho asks carefully.

 

“Of course, go ahead.”

 

“What kind of sickness did he have?” Sho asks nervously, not sure if he is allowed to ask. “And is he healed now?”

 

“Maybe sickness is the wrong word. But he was bound to hospital.” Matsumoto tilts his head. “Yes, he is healed now, at least physically. As for all the details, I think it’s better if he tells you about them himself.” He smiles. “He is a good child, Sho-kun. He is a bit stubborn sometimes, and he is very closed at the moment, but a good child. I hope he will eventually start to trust you and learn to open up again.” He takes a deep breath. “If this is too much for you, Sho-kun, and you think you can’t handle it, I won’t be mad at you for declining. I will pay you well of course, but in the end we both know this is not just about tutoring someone.”

 

Having him as a tutor is just an excuse, Sho thinks. In the end it’s not about receiving good results or marks but for this man’s son to find some joy in things again.

 

“You want me to make him love life again, am I right?” Sho asks carefully. “Because honestly, we both know you could easily pay any college to take him and a top-notch tutor.”

 

The man nods with a smile. “I knew you are a smart child.”

 

“I’m not sure if I’ll be able to succeed,” Sho says after a while. “I don’t know if I can actually make someone happy. I’m not sure if I’m sensitive enough.”

 

Matsumoto chuckles. “Sho-chan,” he teases, using Sho’s old children name. “If I wanted someone sensitive, I would have hired a professional therapist. We have such a person too, don’t worry. What I want for Jun is to open up again and see the positive side of life with the help of a person that is dedicated and full of motivation.”

 

Sho swallows, still worried if he can actually take such an important task without knowing any details, but there is something inside him, a strong urge aside of the money he wants, something that makes it impossible for him to turn this man down. No one has ever wanted him for such an important task. He was always Sho, the son of the famous politician, nothing more, and now here was this man, ready to put his faith into him and to entrust his son to him. “I will do it,” he says firmly. “I can’t promise anything and I’m not sure if I am patient enough or strong enough, but I’ll try.” He looks at Matsumoto hopefully. “Is it possible to get in contact with Jun-kun’s old friends though? I want to see if I can make him meet them at one point.”

 

“Of course,” the man smiles warmly. “We tried it too. They tried. But Jun wasn’t ready yet. Maybe you can open the door for them.”

 

~~~

 

 

Sho found out that Jun had a huge liking in music and literature before. Before whatever, no one tells him anything, not even his parents. It seems like no one really knows much anyways, even the headmaster of Jun’s old school rejects all the personal questions about Jun’s health., and at one point Sho decides not to ask any private details anymore. Maybe it’s better to go into this without any prejudice and as neutral as possible.

 

He has called one of Jun’s friends, his former best friend, a guy named Ninomiya, and he told him that he would be ready to see and meet Jun anytime, an information Sho saves in his mind for the moment Jun might really open up to him.

 

When he told his own father that he got the job, he was overly happy, much to Sho’s surprise. Sho will never forget the proud expression of his father when he told him he is going to help his best friend’s son.

 

The talk with Jun’s father was in his office, but for his tutor (or whatever… companion/have fun/find joy in life) lessons Sho will have to go to the personal villa which is located at a quieter region close to Kyoto. Too quiet, Sho thinks, when he gets off the taxi. Matsumoto-san asked him to stay three weeks at the mansion before his classes and alike will start again. Once they do, he and his son will also move to the apartment in the city and Sho can meet Jun regularly there.

 

“Sakurai-san,” the door opens with a slight screech and the friendly face of a butler greets him.

 

Sho bows. “I’m sorry for coming so late in the evening.”

 

“No problem,” the butler smiles. “We knew there would be a lot of traffic on a Friday afternoon. Unfortunately you won’t be able to meet Jun-sama today. He is still feeling tired at evenings and goes to bed early.”

 

Sho nods, but his stomach clenches in nervousness. He hasn’t seen Jun until now, and he is not sure what he got himself into. He wished he could have met him at the day of his arrival and get this inevitable first awkward meeting over with. But he is in no position to sulk. It’s just natural that Jun already went to sleep.

 

When Sho enters the house, he feels almost a bit intimidated. His own family is pretty wealthy, but the Matsumoto family seems almost like noblemen. Matsumoto-san greets him so warmly though that his feeling of discomfort goes away immediately. They have dinner together and Matsumoto tells him everything about the house and also that he can always take the bus to town. “I don’t expect you to stay here 24/7,” he explains with a smile. “You are young, feel free to go out and roam around. You are not supposed to be with Jun every second. You are not our maid or anything, you are here to spend some time with Jun, but not every wake moment.”

 

Sho frowns. This man pays him for this job. He can’t just slack off and go to town to have some fun. “But-“

 

“Jun still needs longer breaks to sleep and rest,” Matsumoto interrupts him with a grin. “At these hours you will have nothing to do.” He chuckles. “You are like your father, Sho-kun. So serious. I’ll tell Aiba-san to sometimes remind you to take time off.”

 

“Aiba-san?”

 

“My butler,” Matsumoto explains. “His son sometimes visits too. He is a nice and sweet guy. I hoped he would befriend Jun, but…”

 

Sho eyes him curiously. “He couldn’t befriend him?”

 

“Jun’s shell is hard to break,” Matsumoto finally admits. Whatever that means. Sho just wonders how out of all he is supposed to break it when apparently nicer and more sensitive people before him failed.  When Jun’s own family failed! His father seems like such an easy-going and supportive guy, still it seems like Jun doesn’t even open up to him.

 

Later on his way upstairs to his room he notices a wheelchair leaning against the balustrade.

 

“Jun-sama,” the butler whispers. “Is sleeping at the far end of the corridor. Please be quiet when you go to the bathroom not to wake him up. It’s close to his room.”

 

“The wheelchair?” Sho whispers.

 

The man sighs. “Sometimes he still feels weak. He doesn’t always need it anymore though, gladly.”

 

Sho nods, eagerly following the man everywhere and concentrating to remember all the important places. Then he is finally alone, ready to unpack his suitcase. Before he goes to sleep, he goes to the bathroom, brushing his teeth and taking a swift shower. It’s when he gets out of the room and closes the door that he hears a rustling sound and a door that gets closed. Sho turns around swiftly, his eyes searching for the place the noise came from. The only room left is Jun’s. Sho’s lips tug slightly. Look who is curious. He doesn’t linger in the corridor though, afraid that Jun will realize he is lurking around and get scared. Instead he goes to his room and stretches on his bed, grabbing a book with poems. It contains mostly German and French poems, one day he hopes he can read them in their original languages.

 

~~~

 

Sho gets up at 7AM, showering and changing swiftly before heading downstairs. To his disappointment he meets only Matsumoto there. The man laughs. “You are like an open book, Sho-kun,” he smiles. “I’m sorry it’s just me.”

 

Sho blushes deeply. “No, it’s not like that. It’s just…”

 

“I know.” The man smiles reassuringly. “Don’t worry. Just come and eat your breakfast. You are early anyway. I told you you can sleep in.”

 

“But I…” Sho pauses, how should he explain that his sense of duty prohibits him from sleeping in like he is lazy and not taking this seriously. “I can’t treat this as a vacation.”

 

“Hm,” Matsumoto hums. “Listen, Sho-kun. Let’s make a deal. I will never lie to you. When I tell you, you can sleep in, I mean it. When your presence is needed early in the morning, I will tell you too. You are not my butler or maid, you are here to tutor my son, and you don’t need to do that every hour every single day. I would be happy if you see yourself as a guest. You will soon realize that the task I entrusted you with is not an easy one. Which is why I want you to feel at home here.” He chuckles. “You will never meet Jun before 8AM anyways, just so you know. He is bad with mornings. As for today he had a check-up and is not even here right now. He will come back at afternoon.”

 

Sho looks dumbfounded for a moment, even more so when the man in front of him bursts into laughter again. He only stops when Aiba-san brings them their breakfast. Scrambled eggs with ham. Against his intention Sho has to grin too. “My friends always tell me I’m too stuck up and too serious.”

 

“You are genuine,” Matsumoto comments. “I like this about you. You are honest and genuine. I have high hopes in you.”

 

Sho feels pressured almost immediately. He is not a therapist or anything alike. “I… I am just a student, Matsumoto-san.”

 

“I said I have high hopes in you, but it doesn’t mean that I expect you to work miracles. You just do what you can do. You said you don’t want to see this as your vacation. But I would like for you to see it like this, a vacation with a friend of your family, where you spend time with my son and sometimes study with him.”

 

Make him smile.

 

That’s what Matsumoto told him during their first meeting. I want to see him happy again. Sho takes a deep breath. Yes, it’s not like him to freak out before he even started with the task. Just go into it, with full mind and full spirits, that’s the Sakurai-family-motto!

 

Hence Sho decides to take Matsumoto’s advice to heart and get accustomed with the house and its surroundings. It was dark yesterday when he came here, but now he can see everything. There seems to be a huge lake close to the house, there is even a stable with a few horses (Matsumoto himself seems to like riding. Jun not so much as he has no hand for animals, that’s what Aiba-san told him), there is a huge library which makes Sho speechless for minutes, even more so when Matsumoto good-heartedly tells him he can borrow and read as many books as he likes to. Then he goes to his room and reads into the folders he got from Jun’s school to see in which subjects he missed the most. His language skills seem to be good, both in Japanese and in English, probably a natural talent. Maths and science seems to be more of a problem though. He also missed quite some bits of his history and geography classes.

 

Sho decides to wait for Jun and talk with him and see what kind of universities he is interested in. He is slowly really getting into this task here. Finally something interesting to do. He is so engulfed in his work that he almost misses Jun’s arrival.

 

A knock against the door and Aiba-san’s reminder to go downstairs save him from embarrassing himself and not meeting Jun.

 

Once downstairs he carefully takes a glance around the corner. Next to Matsumoto there is a slender figure, black hair, body clad in a wide sweater. Sho steps forward with a smile, finally meeting Jun. He is not sure what he expected, but definitely not this…

A/N: So... we are off to a mysterious start? Seems like something happened last year that made Jun sick (or something alike. Matsumoto said, he lacks a better word.)  Sho and Jun haven't really met yet, but I promise you from next chapter on there will be looooots of scenes between them. The other Arashi guys will make an appearance too!