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yume_to_amePairing: It's going to be a Jun-pairing, but I don't want to spoil it yet. It's either: Sakumoto, Matsumiya or Juntoshi. Jun/Aiba as brothers, and Aiba might get his own pairing.
Rating: up to R
Genre: royality!AU, romance, a bit fantasy,
Plot: To seal the new peace agreement Prince Jun is handed over as a gift to the neighbouring kingdom, the Highlands of Ice. There is a legend surrounding Jun and his sisters and brothers, namely that they hold a secret power which will only be awakened to the fullest when their owner falls in love.
Tired of reigning the Highlands of the Ice the king announces that one of his three sons - Sho, Satoshi and Kazunari - will inherit the throne. As all of them are good men, loyal and talented, he decides to put a challenge to it: Whoever wins the young mysterious prince's heart will marry him and get the throne.*
*Important sidenote: I will not make a love triangle or anything alike. Once Jun decided, he decided. Also Sho and the others won't play dirty.
Note: This is going to be really romantic, I promise :D and I promise you all (!) that the brothers won't treat each other like sh*t. It's super fun to write this! Please tell me what you think <3
Jun doesn’t want to lie to anyone, actually he hasn’t realized that he lied, until he found himself answering “I’m not feeling well” to his brother when he wants to pick him up for a stroll through the town.
Masaki’s forehead is immediately furrowed in worry. “Are you alright, Jun? It happens more often that you are feeling quite sick recently. Maybe we should consult the doctor!?”
It’s then that Jun realizes what he is actually doing. The entire colour gets drained from his face. “I don’t think it’s necessary yet,” he mumbles, also realizing that one lie leads to another. “I will maybe talk to Satoshi-kun about it first.”
“That’s a good idea,” Masaki answers immediately, apparently feeling relieved. Because of all the lies Jun suddenly feels sick for real. “Do you want to play a card game with me instead?” his brother asks softly, his kindness making Jun feel even more guilty.
“Maybe later?” he offers. “I think I need to lie down for a bit.”
“Sure,” Masaki pats his shoulder. “I’ll come and check on you later.”
Jun indeed drops in his bed, hiding his face in his pillow. What is he even doing? Why didn’t he just go for a walk with Masaki? He doesn’t feel particularly sick at the moment or weak, but the moment Masaki asked him it was like an outer body experience for him. Like he suddenly didn’t have control over his reactions anymore and just automatically came up with this lie. It’s so stupid, he loves and trusts Masaki.
Later that day it’s not Masaki looking for him though but Satoshi. Jun feels his presence immediately although he is caught up in his complicated thoughts, not able to focus on anything around him, he doesn’t know the time of the day, doesn’t care for lunch, nothing. But the moment Satoshi comes into his room, it’s like his fevering thoughts halt for a moment.
“Jun-kun,” Satoshi pulls a chair to Jun’s bed to sit down on it. Jun turns around to face him, smiling when Satoshi touches his cheek softly. “I missed you during lunch. Masaki-san said you aren’t feeling well.”
Jun can’t lie to Satoshi. It’s impossible. Much to his surprise he seems to be the only one he can’t directly lie to at the moment. He actually wants to tell him everything, explain to him that his body fights him every time he wants to step outside, but he is weirdly spellbound, and can’t say anything. Much to his surprise Satoshi doesn’t question him, instead he helps him sit up. “Do you want to have tea with me?”
“Of course,” Jun says almost automatically.
Satoshi rewards him with a warm smile. “How about we take our tea outside?” he offers.
Jun blinks, his chest clenching painfully. He has accompanied Satoshi for a little walk sometimes, the only one he dares to join when he has to go outside, but he just can’t be happy about it. “Sure,” he stutters.
“The terrace at the inner courtyard is cleaned up and prepared,” Satoshi explains, making Jun look at him in surprise. The inner courtyard? Well, that makes him feel a bit better. It’s not actually outside, instead it’s surrounded by the thick walls of the castle. “Let’s take a seat in the sun and have some tea. Our cook prepared some fresh fruit cake.”
Jun feels his stomach grumble slightly at the thought of something to eat. He didn’t realize he skipped lunch, but now that Satoshi mentions cake and tea he indeed feels hungry. He nods eagerly, suddenly feeling in a better mood. “Let’s go,” he chirps.
Satoshi chuckles, taking his hand and follows him outside.
~~~
“You have made him join you outside,” Sakamoto says, sounding impressed. He accepts the glass of red wine Kazu offers him.
Satoshi sighs. “Not a huge achievement. It’s just been the inner courtyard, it’s almost like the balcony, secured by walls.”
“More than I could do,” Masaki points out miserably.
“It’s not your fault,” Sho intervenes immediately. “You are doing all you can do!”
Satoshi blinks a bit at Sho’s fierce defence of Masaki’s qualities as an older brother, exchanging a glance with Kazu who just rolls his eyes while pointing at Sho. Satoshi hides his smile. Indeed. He just wonders if Masaki is in any way interested in Sho.
“The incidents at Oguri’s residence unfortunately did influence him,” Sakamoto points out. “I hoped they wouldn’t, but it’s just logical that they did. Shun-san did say that his cousin almost forced himself on Jun, aside of the violence he inflicted upon him.”
What? This bastard actually tried to rape Jun!? Satoshi feels his stomach twisting at Sakamoto’s words, anger washing over him once more for what this awful men did to Jun and for what almost happened to him. He has to take a few breaths to calm down, knowing Jun won’t feel better by his anger. He will probably only project it on himself, feeling like he did something wrong for Satoshi to get angry. That’s the last thing Satoshi wants. Hence he needs to wait patiently until Jun comes around and opens up to him.
“Just why does he push me away?” Masaki mumbles. “Is he mad at me that I didn’t protect him?”
“He feels guilty,” Satoshi hears himself say, sudden realisation rising once he spoke the words. Of course, Jun feels guilty. It’s a vicious circle. He feels traumatized and scared by the recent incidents, but he doesn’t know how to voice his fears and how to tell them how he feels – he probably doesn’t even know himself how he feels – it leads to him being forced into making excuses, which leads to feeling more guilty. The battle in his eyes is obvious whenever Satoshi sees him, up to now Satoshi just wasn’t sure what kind of battle it is. “Let me handle it,” he suddenly says. He nods to himself. He needs to be the one helping Jun. It’s his responsibility. Jun hasn’t locked him out unlike the others. And he is also the one who is going to be married to Jun. He needs to learn to make him open up towards him and to make him trust him.
“But…” Masaki eyes him nervously. “Are you sure?”
“I’ll find a way,” Satoshi says with emphasis.
~~~
To Jun’s surprise but also relief Masaki and the others don’t ask him to go out with them anymore, instead in case they want to visit him or spend time with him, they invite him to the salon for tea or play a card game with him.
But much to Jun’s distress it doesn’t set his mind at ease. Something is wrong with him, he knows that, and avoiding the issue doesn’t help, it just makes things worse. Sometimes he is close to talking to Satoshi about it, but he doesn’t know how to. He is scared that Satoshi might find him silly or will scold him for being such a baby. Same for Masaki. What if he doesn’t take him seriously? He should really man it up. Maybe if he just gets up now and walks outside, he can heal himself from this awful fear.
Jun nods to himself, putting on a light jacket and taking the staircase down to the back entrance of the castle. It will lead him to the park with the beautiful flowers and trees which are probably green right now and blossoming. There is also the white rose bush which he let bloom for Satoshi. Jun flinches at the thought. It makes him remember how he went there together with Oguri, and how he suddenly hit him unconscious and-
Jun lets his hand drop down from the doorknob, tears prickling in his eyes.
“Here you are, my love.” He suddenly hears a voice behind him. When he spins around he looks directly into Satoshi’s warm caramel-coloured eyes. They are clouded with worry now, and Jun feels instantly bad. Again, he is worrying him again. Apparently he can’t do anything else at the moment. “I don’t know the demons you are fighting right now,” Satoshi says all of a sudden, and approaches him and takes his hand, his warm fingers wrapping around it tightly. “But I want you to share your thoughts with me, even the sad and frightful ones.”
Jun feels tears burning in his eyes. “I can’t,” he mumbles.
Satoshi takes him into his arms, fingers touching his back soothingly. “Why don’t you trust me, Jun?”
“I do trust you,” Jun says with emphasis.
“Not enough to let me inside,” Satoshi says and pulls away a bit. Jun’s eyes widen in shock. That’s not true, he trusts Satoshi! It’s not that simple. “Maybe I need to show you that you can rely on me,” Satoshi says with a comforting smile. “Come,” he adds and approaches the door.
Jun’s insides clench in fear. “I…”
“I’m not going to let go of your hand,” Satoshi says calmly. “But you need to come outside with me, Jun, you can’t lock yourself in forever.” He smiles warmly. “We want to have an outdoor wedding, don’t we?”
Jun blushes and nods.
“And I’m sure you want to have a say in which flowers to pick and what to wear?” Jun nods again and Satoshi adds: “You will want to go to the village to be able to choose what you truly want.”
Jun bites down on his lips. Again that’s true.
“Let me help you fight it,” Satoshi says with insistence before he smiles secretively. “Besides, I have a surprise for you.”
“A surprise?” Jun asks, slight curiosity rising inside him.
“Yes, but it’s outside.”
Jun tilts his head, eyeing the door nervously. “It’s not a trick, is it?”
“Jun-kun,” Satoshi says earnestly. “Do you really think I would trick you like that?”
Jun shakes his head vehemently before taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I’ll try it.”
The smile Satoshi shows him now shines in pride and joy, and Jun knows immediately it was the right decision to allow Satoshi to help him. He takes Satoshi’s offered hand and carefully steps outside with him. His heart beats faster, his breath hitches slightly, but he tries to concentrate on Satoshi’s scent and his warm fingers around his hand. Satoshi talks to him here and there, probably to make him loose his tension.
Jun is so concentrated on not feeling anxious that he doesn’t realize that Satoshi leads him through the garden until they reach the backyard. There is a small hill behind it, and it used to be just empty without trees and anything green and-
Jun gasps, eyes widening in surprise. Where there used to be nothing there is a beautiful fountain now with finely crafted figurines, around it there are rare flowers, covering the whole hill. In between them there are small paths out of stone to walk on, little benches to sit down on. Jun even spots some tiny trees that will be growing into full sized once in a few years. The plants that grace this beautiful spot are not only summer-plants, but also some that will remain green in winter, some that blossom in spring and others that will carry leaves and blossoms deep into fall. There are small streams moving through some areas, providing the plants with water, and leading to the fountain. The whole area is surrounded by a beautiful stone wall that’s not too high to suffocate someone but high enough to be intimidating to an outsider. “You…built me a garden,” Jun says in deepest disbelief and surprise. It’s an oasis, a little paradise. “A garden… with water, and flowers and…”
He swallows, trying to hold back his tears, but he can’t help but burst into them. Satoshi chuckles. “You are crying again, Jun-kun. We need to do something about that, really.” He smiles. “Happy birthday!”
“Happy…” Jun forgets his tears for a moment, staring at Satoshi in surprise. He frowns, wait a moment… “What day do we have?” he asks carefully.
Satoshi looks at him for a moment before he bursts into laughter. “You forgot your own birthday, my dear?” Jun blushes, realizing he indeed forgot which day they have. “How can you be so cute?”
“I’m not cute,” Jun stutters in embarrassment.
Satoshi smiles, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “The cutest. So how do you like your present?”
Jun laughs and wraps his arms around Satoshi, pulling him into a tight embrace. “You are the most wonderful person ever,” he presses a kiss against Satoshi’s lips.
“So, I assume you like it?” Satoshi asks with a smile.
“I love it,” Jun says with emphasis, letting go of Satoshi’s hand and hurrying into the garden to check on everything. He can’t believe it. Satoshi basically built him his own happy and safety spot.
“My father bought a few dogs,” Satoshi says from the side. He is leaning against the wall and watches Jun with an obvious content smile. “Your brother is training them right now. One of them will be here in this garden, so whenever you feel uncertain or not safe, he is going to be there.”
Jun bites down on his lips. “Was it so obvious how I felt?”
Satoshi sighs, approaching Jun to take his hand and walk around with him. “To be honest, first it wasn’t, but after a while I kind of figured out where your closed off behaviour is coming from.” Jun sighs deeply, he has hoped not to bother anyone, but it seems he did. Satoshi however seems to sense his discomfort. “You did nothing wrong, Jun-kun, no one blames you. I mean it: no one. Everyone here wants to see you happy.”
Jun nods tentatively. “Then I’ll try to fight against my fears. How about…” his voice shakes slightly at his suggestion, but he tries to fight it. “…we come here every day to read a bit in our current book? Even if it’s just for ten minutes. Do you think I can do it?”
Satoshi nods approvingly. “I think you can do it.” He smiles tentatively, like he has more to say.
“Tell me what’s on your mind,” Jun begs. “You have never held back to tell me your opinion.”
“Fine,” Satoshi smiles warmly, squeezing Jun’s hand. “I also think you have to fight it, Jun-kun. Sometimes in life we don’t have an option. We fight or we don’t fight. This is such a situation. Please don’t give up fighting for us, I will do the same.”
“I won’t become someone who doesn’t fight,” Jun answers after a while.
Satoshi seems to be relieved by his answer, his thumb brushes over Jun’s wrist. “Jun-kun, don’t lock me out of your problems. I know you think I might not understand or react badly, but trust me at least a tiny bit. If you are not telling me anything it means you might not trust me. If there is anything I can do to make you trust me fully, please tell me and I’ll work on it.”
“But I do trust you,” Jun says with emphasis, shocked that Satoshi thinks otherwise.
“Show me that you do,” Satoshi says earnestly. “Dare me, and tell me about this fear that is hunting you. I won’t disappoint you, Jun. I will never deliberately hurt you. You have to believe me as much.”
Jun nods. “I promise I won’t keep you outside anymore.”
Satoshi smiles contently, wrapping an arm around Jun. Jun can’t help a chuckle, earning him a curious glance from Satoshi. “What’s so funny?”
“You had to lecture me again,” Jun teases. “You are worse than Sakamoto.”
Satoshi chuckles. “Look who is getting cheeky again. I didn’t lecture you.”
Jun smiles. “It’s fine. It’s one of the things I love about you.”
“My lectures?”
Jun shrugs. “That you don’t hold back and are honest to me. You are always kind and warm, but you are not scared to tell me when I do something wrong. I like that you don’t mask your emotions. It’s what made me fall in love with you in the first place. It means a lot to me that you are so open towards me. I will try to be more open too.”
“We’ll work to walk towards a happy future together,” Satoshi promises, making Jun’s heart jump happily.
“I hope so, because I want at least five children.”
Satoshi chuckles. “Five?”
“Yes,” Jun says firmly. “Two girls and two boys. The first one needs to be a girl, I want a little princess to spoil. And there are too many men here anyways.”
“And the fifth?” Satoshi asks in obvious amusement.
“One of the four will be twins,” Jun says dryly. “Which sums it up to five. Gender doesn’t matter.”
“I see, you already have a full thought-of plan,” Satoshi presses a kiss against his hair. “May I at least enjoy the first months of our marriage with you alone?”
Jun chuckles. “You may.
“And are you going to tell me now what truly bothers you?” Satoshi wants to know.
Jun swallows, before taking a brave nod. “I will. Let’s go inside?” he asks. “It’s getting a bit cold.”
Satoshi smiles. “Yes, let’s go back, meet the others for dinner and your surprise-birthday party, which I never told you about, and then settle down in your chambers.”
Jun giggles. “I hate surprise birthday parties.”
“I know,” Satoshi chuckles. “But please pretend to be surprised. Besides, later I have a present for you.”
“Another present?” Jun asks in shock. “But Satoshi-kun, you already gave me the best present ever. It’s too much.”
Satoshi smiles brightly. “I made it myself with you in my mind. And I want to give it to you. Let me have that little joy, my dear.”
“You are too kind,” Jun says with a happy smile, and gives in to Satoshi’s generous presents – he is kind of reluctant to accept so many presents, because Satoshi gives him so much, but he is also happy because it also shows how much he cares and loves him. Jun’s chest feels warm in love. He wants to give him something in return, show him how much he loves and trusts him. He nods to himself. “In exchange I will try to be fully honest with you tonight. I promise to tell you everything.”
A/N: Hello everyone! How are you guys doingt? Still around? :-)
Jun is back <3 And Satoshi is really kind, isn't he? What do you think about his birthday present for Jun? :D (and there is yet another one to come) He outdid himself, didn't he? I think it really shows how much Jun means to him. And I think Jun is ready to talk to him about his problems now.
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Date: 2017-09-23 07:48 pm (UTC)That garden is a masterpiece... How could anyone resist such a present? Satoshi is so thoughtful and so caring... My heart...
And I start to see a Sakuraiba up there >//////< kyaa~ They are sooooo cute!
I wonder what Satoshi will present to Jun next? And Jun's future plan... I feel fluff all over it! Satoshi will make a good father >////<
Thank you for this lovely chapter again <3
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Date: 2017-10-01 04:22 pm (UTC)Thanks so much for your sweet comment!! ♥
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Date: 2017-09-23 09:29 pm (UTC)I love how Jun is so fragile but willing to fight himself. Hope they will be happy together soon.
Thank you for writing and sharing, I've read since the 1st Chapter but just got to comment now. Really enjoying this and always waiting for the updates. Thanks again... 😘
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Date: 2017-10-01 04:23 pm (UTC)Thanks so much for your lovely comment! I'm so happy to see you around here!! ♥
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Date: 2017-09-23 11:48 pm (UTC)I couldn't help laughing at Jun's certainty about their future children. I'm sure that he will find a way to make it happen exactly as he imagined.
So the Sakuraiba feels deepen with each chapter too?
The garden sounds like such a beautiful and healing place. 💜
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Date: 2017-10-01 04:24 pm (UTC)Haha, yes, I think so too. Jun will find a way to make his wish for the future happen ^^
Thanks so much for your support, my friend! ♥
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Date: 2017-09-24 01:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-10-01 04:25 pm (UTC)Satoshi just wants to shower Jun with love now <3
Thanks so much for your comment, my dear!! ♥
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Date: 2017-09-24 02:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-10-01 04:25 pm (UTC)(It is a wonderful present, right? :-))
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Date: 2017-09-24 09:54 am (UTC)I'm jealous about them. And I'm still looking for someone who will be like Satoshi in real life for my future-husband. XD
Anyway~ Satoshi are so great. After that big present there is another surprise? And... it can't be call with suprised party if you said it to Jun, Satoshi... 😂
I hope Jun'll be more open himself too satoshi if he want that 5 childs soon. Hehehe...
Sankyuu for this chapter. I'll wait for you next ^ - ^
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Date: 2017-10-01 04:26 pm (UTC)Yes, there is another little surprise for Jun ^^
Thanks so much for your lovely comment! ♥
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Date: 2017-09-24 10:31 am (UTC)Somehow, I cannot say that I'm worried about Jun now since we all know that everybody, especially Satoshi, is going to help him with overflowing love....Awwww this chapter makes me so happy! Fighting your inner demons is indeed difficult though. However, it's good that Jun is now ready to tell everything. Thanks to Satoshi! He did a lot for Jun... <3
The garden is wonderful! Just imagine some yummy-looking guy giving you a garden! I might marry him immediately! Hahhaah kidding! Anyway, it's so cute when they talked about the babies and it's really Jun opening such topic, huh! Can you also show us how they're going to make the five babies? Wahhahahaha *jumps excitedly ...
Thank you for the update dear! I always look forward for weekends to come because of this one! hahhaha <3
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Date: 2017-10-01 04:29 pm (UTC)I'm not sure if I'm going to show you all five babies - I mean, that would be a whole new multi-chapter I think :D :D
Thanks so much for your lovely and encouraging comments!! They always make me so happy! ♥
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Date: 2017-09-24 12:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2017-10-01 04:31 pm (UTC)Thanks so much for your lovely comment!!!! ♥
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Date: 2017-09-26 07:19 pm (UTC)Anyway, it's good that Jun is back, and that Satoshi is trying to help. I hope he does open up to him ^^
That gift was really thoughtful! I wonder what the other gift might be~~~
Thank you for the update ^^
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Date: 2017-10-01 04:32 pm (UTC)Satoshi is really spoiling Jun, isn't he? But Jun deserves some happiness <3
Thanks so much for your comment, my dear! ♥
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Date: 2017-09-27 01:01 am (UTC)Oh my...i just smell Sakuraiba...
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Date: 2017-10-01 04:32 pm (UTC)Thanks so much for your lovely comment! ♥
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Date: 2017-09-29 05:50 pm (UTC)Five children? Wow they'll be making a very big family in the future with little cute little princesses and princes running around and being pampered by their parents and uncles and granpa. What a cute beautiful image <3
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Date: 2017-10-01 04:34 pm (UTC)(Haha, their children would get so pampered with all these uncles around!)
Thanks so much for your lovely comment!! ♥
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Date: 2017-10-01 08:23 am (UTC)he really takes a good care of Jun and I hope whatever bothers Jun right now can be solved with Satoshi's help.
About the birthday surprise, I'm so envy with the attention Jun got from Satoshi. He made him a garden, OMG, that's just so sweet.
I'm looking forward to Jun's confession, I hope nothing bad about it ^^
thanks for sharing this chapter :))
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Date: 2017-10-01 04:35 pm (UTC)Satoshi and Jun really love each other a lot, and now that Jun is back and safe, Satoshi wants him to recover emotionally, and he just wants to show him how much he loves him <3
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Date: 2017-10-06 04:00 am (UTC)Thanks for the update. 💜
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Date: 2017-10-22 05:33 pm (UTC)Thanks for reading and commenting!! <3